On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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