They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
