Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
