Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
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