It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
