Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
