Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
