so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
