Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
