don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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