I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
