I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
