By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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