So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize