I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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