my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
