I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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