Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize
