Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
