i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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