Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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