there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
