Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
