Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
