it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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