just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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