i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
