And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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