Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
