I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
