Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
