I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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