I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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