Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
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Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
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How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
We are all done wearing pants today
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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