His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
