That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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