I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
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Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
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Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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