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Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
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