yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
