her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I am naked and annoyed.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
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