Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize
