i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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