how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
