Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
