the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
