He is such a slut. More and more my type.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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