bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize