what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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