hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
