Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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